I found this on The Unreliable Novelist. I mean, right?
Abandon All Hope, You Who Enter Here.
FIRST CIRCLE: LIMBO
I have this, like, really really good idea. I’ll just think about it constantly for several years, take lots of brilliant notes and tell all my friends about it so they can admire my genius.
SECOND CIRCLE: LUST
My book tour is going to rock! I’m going to charm the shit out of Jimmy Fallon. And maybe Ryan Gosling too.
THIRD CIRCLE: GLUTTONY
Hmm, feeling a little stuck here. Maybe cake will help. And booze. Definitely booze.
FOURTH CIRCLE: GREED
I must hoard all my ideas so you can’t steal them and succeed before I do.
FIFTH CIRCLE: ANGER
SIXTH CIRCLE: HERESY
God damn writer’s block.
SEVENTH CIRCLE: VIOLENCE, BLASPHEMY AND SUICIDE
Another draft for the bonfire. MotherF@CKER. Kill me now.
EIGTH CIRCLE: FRAUD
I have no idea what I’m doing. Everyone is whispering about me behind my back.
NINTH CIRCLE: TREACHERY
In the absence of any truly original ideas, I’m going to steal scenes, characters and dialogue directly from my friends’ lives.
Conclusion: I’m going to have to pass through the center of the earth to finish this thing.