Ikea and a food memoir that I didn’t actually read: my week in Florida.

Last week, I drove down to Miami to help my boyfriend
move into his new apartment. While I was there, I took Molly for 18 walks a
day, and the only thing I read were Ikea instructions. Actually, there was no reading involved,
because in the interest of saving money and confusing the hell out of everyone,
Ikea manuals are basically furniture-making manga starring some ghost people.
Because I was in their company (so to speak) so often, the Ikeapeople really
started coming to life for me, and now I sort of think Ikea should hire me to
think up and illustrate some of the Ikeapeople's stories. I actually put together a little
something, based on the glorious day Chandler and I brought home a modular shelving
unit for his pots and pans, just to show the people at Ikea exactly what I’m
talking about:


 
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Right before I left, I received Fuschia Dunlop’s
memoir of eating in China, “Shark’s Fin and Sichuan Pepper”.  Before I got it in the mail, I kept thinking
‘aaaaaaw shit, this better arrive before I go down to Florida for the week, or I'm gonna bust some heads*.’ I’m
so glad it came in time for me to entirely neglect it.

In July, I was in Shanghai and I had a sort of
awakening vis a vis Chinese food. The principal agent of that awakening:
Sichuan dan dan noodles. Coming home from the restaurant where I ate them
(Crystal Jade at Xintiandi, holla!**), still sort of dazed by what had just
gone on in my mouth (also, because it was really spicy and my mouth was
burning), I had this idea that I’d heard of dan dan noodles before, and it
turns out I had, on
The Wednesday Chef. That’s how I found out about Fuschia
Dunlop.

I’d like to try making the dan dan noodles, but I
also feel like every time I try to cook Chinese (or Mexican) food it ends up
tasting not great. I live in a little city though, so I guess it’s bully for me,
otherwise. 200-word-review to come!

*read: think about leaving a moderately snippy review on Amazon.

**I feel like I always misuse holla, but I refuse to
look it up, because then my use of it would be so limited.

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